hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
