My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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