I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
