You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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