So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
