I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
