Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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