around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
