no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize