i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
