He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
