This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize