It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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