how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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