He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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