ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
