Buhtt sex?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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