Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize