I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
worst night to have a conscience
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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