If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
