Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
