Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
