tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
bring money and cleavage
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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