how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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