I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize
