I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
