I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
