hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
