Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize