Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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