The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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