Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
