yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
