belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
