That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
im six kinds of drunk right now
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
