Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
