Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
people are starting to question the shark bite story
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
