My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
