I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Randomize
