I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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