Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
