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The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
don't judge my taste in strippers
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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