You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
