What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
foreskin is a definite game changer
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
