There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
