Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
