So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
