Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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