I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
