I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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