She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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